1 00:00:06,085 --> 00:00:10,669 -(acoustic guitar playing soft, slow melody) -(fire crackling) 2 00:00:10,752 --> 00:00:13,001 Man: ♪ If God had a name ♪ 3 00:00:13,085 --> 00:00:15,168 All (softly): ♪ What would it be? ♪ 4 00:00:15,251 --> 00:00:18,835 ♪ And would you call it to his face ♪ 5 00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:24,001 ♪ If you were faced with him in all of his glory? ♪ 6 00:00:24,085 --> 00:00:29,085 ♪ What would you ask if you had just one question? ♪ 7 00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:33,710 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 8 00:00:33,794 --> 00:00:36,210 ♪ God is great ♪ 9 00:00:36,293 --> 00:00:38,669 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 10 00:00:38,752 --> 00:00:41,001 ♪ God is good ♪ 11 00:00:41,085 --> 00:00:43,502 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 12 00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:45,502 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 13 00:00:45,585 --> 00:00:49,293 ♪ What if God was one of us ♪ 14 00:00:50,627 --> 00:00:54,001 ♪ Just a slob like one of us ♪ 15 00:00:55,460 --> 00:00:59,043 ♪ Just a stranger on a bus ♪ 16 00:00:59,126 --> 00:01:02,669 ♪ Trying to make his way home? ♪ 17 00:01:05,794 --> 00:01:08,377 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 18 00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:10,669 ♪ God is great ♪ 19 00:01:10,752 --> 00:01:12,835 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 20 00:01:12,919 --> 00:01:15,502 (coughing) 21 00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:18,001 There you go, Charlie. 22 00:01:18,085 --> 00:01:20,502 -Sorry... (clears throat) -Hanni: It's fine. 23 00:01:26,043 --> 00:01:30,251 So, where are you going again, UCLA? 24 00:01:30,335 --> 00:01:32,126 UC Santa Barbara. 25 00:01:32,210 --> 00:01:33,960 Is that where Shawn goes? 26 00:01:34,043 --> 00:01:37,752 No. He goes to Westmont. It's, like, close. 27 00:01:37,835 --> 00:01:40,418 -Mm. -Hanni: I don't know. 28 00:01:40,502 --> 00:01:42,418 I just wanna get off the East Coast. 29 00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:44,752 I, like, need to be in California. 30 00:01:44,835 --> 00:01:46,335 Yeah, totally. 31 00:01:50,502 --> 00:01:52,710 -Hanni: It's cashed. -Mm. 32 00:01:52,794 --> 00:01:54,460 Hanni: We should go. 33 00:01:55,293 --> 00:01:57,210 You can keep it. 34 00:01:57,293 --> 00:02:00,377 -Really? -Yeah. I don't need it. I have a ton. 35 00:02:07,001 --> 00:02:10,251 (indistinct chattering) 36 00:02:12,335 --> 00:02:15,377 ♪ ♪ 37 00:02:22,585 --> 00:02:24,877 ♪ ♪ 38 00:02:36,543 --> 00:02:38,585 (birds twittering) 39 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:52,251 Hey. Do you want this? 40 00:02:53,043 --> 00:02:55,210 Uh, nah. Goodwill. 41 00:03:03,251 --> 00:03:05,460 Uh, what about this one? 42 00:03:05,543 --> 00:03:08,669 Uh, yeah, keep that one. She liked it. 43 00:03:08,752 --> 00:03:11,669 Actually, um, I'm going to take that one back with me 44 00:03:11,752 --> 00:03:13,126 if that's cool. 45 00:03:13,710 --> 00:03:16,043 -Sure. -Cool. 46 00:03:31,835 --> 00:03:33,335 -Hey. -Hmm? 47 00:03:33,418 --> 00:03:34,919 You wanna smoke this? 48 00:03:36,335 --> 00:03:38,543 -I-I don't think that you should be doing-- -Charlie: Oh, my God. 49 00:03:38,627 --> 00:03:40,919 It's, like, not a big deal. Okay? 50 00:03:41,001 --> 00:03:44,085 I'm still sober, I promise. 51 00:03:44,168 --> 00:03:46,835 This is the only thing that I do now. Okay? 52 00:03:49,669 --> 00:03:51,585 (sighs) 53 00:03:51,669 --> 00:03:53,669 Okay. 54 00:03:53,752 --> 00:03:56,960 -I'm sorry. -No, it's fine. I appreciate your concern. 55 00:03:59,794 --> 00:04:01,877 Oh, my God. Look at this. 56 00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:03,418 (chuckles) 57 00:04:03,502 --> 00:04:06,210 -It's from my God phase. -Oh, wow. 58 00:04:06,293 --> 00:04:08,960 -(chuckles) -(Eva speaks indistinctly) 59 00:04:10,460 --> 00:04:13,085 You know, it was cool she let you do that. 60 00:04:13,168 --> 00:04:18,794 Yeah. She was definitely exceptionally tolerant of me. 61 00:04:20,377 --> 00:04:21,835 (sighs) 62 00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:32,001 (sobbing softly) 63 00:04:38,377 --> 00:04:39,835 (sniffles) 64 00:04:43,126 --> 00:04:45,126 (sobbing continues) 65 00:04:49,794 --> 00:04:51,877 You don't know if you could use the money? 66 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:53,210 Eva: (sighs) It's just weird. 67 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,835 I mean... 68 00:04:55,752 --> 00:04:57,543 Do we have to sell it? 69 00:04:58,502 --> 00:05:00,335 We could wait a little while. 70 00:05:02,210 --> 00:05:06,293 Yeah, I mean, we can like, totally wait... 71 00:05:06,377 --> 00:05:08,210 if you want, but... 72 00:05:09,168 --> 00:05:12,001 I'm definitely not moving back here. 73 00:05:13,543 --> 00:05:15,001 (sighs) 74 00:05:15,085 --> 00:05:17,335 Charlie: Did you wanna live here? 75 00:05:17,418 --> 00:05:19,585 Yeah. Maybe. 76 00:05:19,669 --> 00:05:21,418 Really? 77 00:05:23,210 --> 00:05:24,877 (sighs) 78 00:05:25,710 --> 00:05:28,001 That's a super long commute. 79 00:05:30,001 --> 00:05:33,418 ♪ ♪ 80 00:05:33,502 --> 00:05:35,669 (seagulls screeching) 81 00:05:38,293 --> 00:05:41,585 (indistinct chattering) 82 00:05:42,418 --> 00:05:44,126 (lighter clicking) 83 00:05:45,627 --> 00:05:48,752 Eva and Family: ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 84 00:05:49,794 --> 00:05:52,251 Woman: Yay! 85 00:05:53,293 --> 00:05:55,669 (patrons chattering) 86 00:05:55,752 --> 00:05:58,043 Fuck. I'm going on my break. 87 00:05:58,126 --> 00:06:00,293 (both chuckle) 88 00:06:00,377 --> 00:06:03,085 -Uh, do you have a light? -Oh, sure. 89 00:06:05,585 --> 00:06:06,835 Dana: Thanks. 90 00:06:06,919 --> 00:06:08,919 (chattering) 91 00:06:11,585 --> 00:06:12,877 (distant siren wails) 92 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,168 -(dishware clattering) -(chattering) 93 00:06:15,251 --> 00:06:17,627 I mean, literally, there's not a single server in here. 94 00:06:17,710 --> 00:06:19,710 Wait, wait. Could you do that one more time, 95 00:06:19,794 --> 00:06:21,210 'cause I didn't have the camera on, 96 00:06:21,293 --> 00:06:23,043 and I really want to get that. 97 00:06:23,126 --> 00:06:24,543 Hang on. Okay. 98 00:06:24,627 --> 00:06:27,335 (in gruff voice): Bill just wants to drink his beer. 99 00:06:27,418 --> 00:06:30,877 (laughs) I like that reading. Oh, wait. Here's one. 100 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:34,251 Hello? Hello? 101 00:06:34,335 --> 00:06:37,877 -Do you see me? Hello? Hi, hi, hi. -(Ted laughing) 102 00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:40,043 -Oh! I'm so sorry about that. -Bill: Hi! 103 00:06:40,126 --> 00:06:42,210 Uh, I can take care of this whenever you're ready. No rush. 104 00:06:42,293 --> 00:06:45,168 Uh, you delivered his beer with the lid still on, 105 00:06:45,251 --> 00:06:46,835 so if you could just pop that off for us, 106 00:06:46,919 --> 00:06:48,835 -that would be great. -Dana: Oh, my God. I am so sorry. 107 00:06:49,835 --> 00:06:51,710 Ted: No worries. Thank you. 108 00:06:51,794 --> 00:06:53,460 Oh, with the lighter. 109 00:06:54,085 --> 00:06:55,168 (lid pops) 110 00:06:55,251 --> 00:06:56,710 -Ted and Bill: Oh! -(all chuckle) 111 00:06:56,794 --> 00:06:59,377 -Ted: That's clever. -Yeah. 112 00:07:01,335 --> 00:07:02,960 Mmm! 113 00:07:04,543 --> 00:07:06,710 -Ted: Thank you. -Dana: Of course. 114 00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:09,627 Oh, could I get one more strawberry margarita before we go? 115 00:07:09,710 --> 00:07:12,460 But we would like to drink together, though. 116 00:07:12,543 --> 00:07:14,794 Dana: Uh, okay. Uh, right away. 117 00:07:14,877 --> 00:07:16,877 -So sorry, again. -Ted: No, thank you. What was your name again? 118 00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:18,710 -Uh, Dana. -Dana. Thank you, Dana. 119 00:07:18,794 --> 00:07:20,335 -Of course. -Mm-hmm. 120 00:07:21,710 --> 00:07:23,251 You should have recorded that. 121 00:07:23,335 --> 00:07:25,085 Oh, come on. Being a server's hard. 122 00:07:25,168 --> 00:07:26,877 You've never done it, and she's cute. 123 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:28,251 You could smell the cigarettes on her. 124 00:07:28,335 --> 00:07:29,752 She took like a 12-minute break. 125 00:07:29,835 --> 00:07:31,377 What is this, like Ruby Tuesday? 126 00:07:31,460 --> 00:07:33,627 -Ted: They have excellent bread. -Mm. 127 00:07:34,877 --> 00:07:37,085 -Sarah Michelle. -(laughs) 128 00:07:37,168 --> 00:07:40,377 -And I'm keeping this. Thank you very much. -Uh-uh. 129 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,460 -Ted: Here she comes. -(Bill clears throat) 130 00:07:42,543 --> 00:07:47,460 So this, and the margarita, are on the house. 131 00:07:47,543 --> 00:07:48,960 Oh! 132 00:07:49,043 --> 00:07:51,168 So sorry, again. Hope you have a good night. 133 00:07:51,251 --> 00:07:54,001 -Could you put that in a to-go box? -Dana: Uh, of course. 134 00:07:54,085 --> 00:07:56,377 Thank you so much, Dana. 135 00:07:58,835 --> 00:08:00,126 Okay, that was nice. 136 00:08:00,210 --> 00:08:01,627 Dana. 137 00:08:01,710 --> 00:08:04,251 Date night. We do it every Friday, 138 00:08:04,335 --> 00:08:06,126 14 years strong, 139 00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:08,627 and... it works. 140 00:08:08,710 --> 00:08:09,835 Now... 141 00:08:09,919 --> 00:08:11,669 This week, it wasn't a bust. 142 00:08:11,752 --> 00:08:14,293 We went to see Birdman, and finally got to see 143 00:08:14,377 --> 00:08:17,418 Michael Keaton do something more than Batman. 144 00:08:17,502 --> 00:08:19,460 -(doorbell rings) -Although I did love him in Mr. Mom. 145 00:08:19,543 --> 00:08:22,043 -Bill, company! Thank you. -I'll get it. 146 00:08:22,710 --> 00:08:24,460 Uh, from there we took a risk 147 00:08:24,543 --> 00:08:27,502 -to a new neighborhood joint, called Gianara's. -(door opens) 148 00:08:27,585 --> 00:08:30,001 -And, look, I thought the place was lovely. -(indistinct chattering) 149 00:08:30,085 --> 00:08:33,335 But Bill really, he thought it was a little, uh, 150 00:08:33,418 --> 00:08:35,835 spotty in the service area. Hi! 151 00:08:35,919 --> 00:08:37,835 -Hi, how are you? Hey. -Ted: Dealerista! 152 00:08:37,919 --> 00:08:39,335 Oh, my God. Look at those shoes. 153 00:08:39,418 --> 00:08:42,960 Will you please, please tap those toes for me? 154 00:08:43,043 --> 00:08:44,877 -Uh... (stammers) Ignore him. -Oh. 155 00:08:46,752 --> 00:08:48,669 -Ted: Oh-ho! Peggy Sawyer! -The Guy: Thank you. 156 00:08:48,752 --> 00:08:50,335 What can I get for you gentlemen? 157 00:08:50,418 --> 00:08:52,043 Ted: You can solve an argument for us. 158 00:08:52,126 --> 00:08:53,502 We're in a fight. 159 00:08:53,585 --> 00:08:55,502 -Can you please-- Yes. -Really? 160 00:08:55,585 --> 00:08:57,335 We just wanna see if this tiramisu 161 00:08:57,418 --> 00:09:00,293 will take a restaurant review from a "meh" to a "yeah." 162 00:09:00,377 --> 00:09:01,960 You can say "no." 163 00:09:02,043 --> 00:09:04,210 Oh, I won't turn down a tirami-susie. 164 00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:05,752 (Ted giggles) 165 00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,627 -Thoughts? -So-so. 166 00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:14,710 -So, so good. -Ah, see! 167 00:09:14,794 --> 00:09:18,085 You heard it here first, YouTube! 168 00:09:18,168 --> 00:09:19,752 Oh, I don't want my face on YouTube. 169 00:09:19,835 --> 00:09:21,585 -Ted: No? But-- -Please, no. 170 00:09:21,669 --> 00:09:23,585 Oh, no? But you're such a natural. 171 00:09:23,669 --> 00:09:26,335 -No. -Ted: Look, you're like a young Elliott Gould. 172 00:09:28,752 --> 00:09:29,919 What movie? 173 00:09:30,001 --> 00:09:32,085 (speaking à la Schwarzenegger): The flavors are awesome. 174 00:09:32,168 --> 00:09:33,877 The sponge, perfect. 175 00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:35,877 I give it five fingers. 176 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:37,835 Ted (over computer): Oh, five fingers! Heavens! 177 00:09:37,919 --> 00:09:40,251 Well, thank you! You heard it here first. 178 00:09:40,335 --> 00:09:42,877 Until next time, this is Ted and Bill signing off. 179 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:44,418 We'll see you around the campus. 180 00:09:44,502 --> 00:09:46,210 What campus? 181 00:09:46,293 --> 00:09:49,251 Ted: Well? What do you think? 182 00:09:49,335 --> 00:09:51,543 Well, I think it's... 183 00:09:52,210 --> 00:09:55,460 sort of unsettling, but maybe that's good. 184 00:09:55,543 --> 00:09:57,585 (distant siren wailing) 185 00:09:57,669 --> 00:09:59,585 And he's kind of hot. 186 00:09:59,669 --> 00:10:01,168 Hmm. 187 00:10:03,835 --> 00:10:05,585 Ted: I wish he didn't use that voice. 188 00:10:05,669 --> 00:10:07,752 Bill: Yeah, I'm not sure that's one's gonna win the Webby. 189 00:10:07,835 --> 00:10:09,460 Ted: Well, if you would've played along and tasted the cake, 190 00:10:09,543 --> 00:10:11,710 -it would've been totally cute. -Bill: I'm tired. 191 00:10:11,794 --> 00:10:13,919 Ooh, girl, my ass is dragging... 192 00:10:14,001 --> 00:10:16,418 -Bill: It'll be fine. -Ted: Just let me find a lighter. 193 00:10:16,502 --> 00:10:18,251 I just need to sterilize the pin. 194 00:10:18,335 --> 00:10:20,460 -Bill: No, I can do it. -Ted: You can't even reach the cyst. 195 00:10:20,543 --> 00:10:22,085 -Bill: Yes, I can. -Ted: You can't reach the cyst. 196 00:10:22,168 --> 00:10:24,585 -Bill: Leave it alone. Get back! -Ted: Well, just breathe. 197 00:10:24,669 --> 00:10:26,418 Ted: If you don't hold still, it's gonna hurt worse... 198 00:10:26,502 --> 00:10:28,251 Bill: That's way too much to pay 199 00:10:28,335 --> 00:10:30,085 for some fucking splash back. 200 00:10:30,168 --> 00:10:32,669 Ted: That's what they cost, and you're calling it a splash back, 201 00:10:32,752 --> 00:10:34,919 -and it's called a backsplash. -Bill: Jesus Christ. 202 00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:36,919 Will you please stop breathing down my neck 203 00:10:37,001 --> 00:10:39,460 for one fucking second? 204 00:10:39,543 --> 00:10:41,251 I'm not anywhere near your neck... 205 00:10:41,335 --> 00:10:43,960 Ted: They always have the neatest flower arrangements 206 00:10:44,043 --> 00:10:46,335 on the table, candles are lit for you. 207 00:10:46,418 --> 00:10:49,418 Oh, and always try and sit in Geoffrey's section. 208 00:10:49,502 --> 00:10:52,794 He is the most spectacular server. 209 00:10:52,877 --> 00:10:55,126 -Bill: Jesus. -Ted: I'm sorry, what did you say, Bill? 210 00:10:55,210 --> 00:10:56,960 -Bill: Nothing. I didn't say anything. -Ted: Yeah, you ruined a take. 211 00:10:57,043 --> 00:10:59,669 -I heard you. -Bill: Did I? Oh! Talk about Geoffrey some more. 212 00:10:59,752 --> 00:11:01,085 Ted: Oh, my God, you're exhausting. 213 00:11:01,168 --> 00:11:02,585 Take a yoga class or something. 214 00:11:02,669 --> 00:11:04,835 I mean, meditate, breathe. Jesus... 215 00:11:04,919 --> 00:11:07,669 Ted: I just want us to constantly be evolving. 216 00:11:07,752 --> 00:11:10,835 Bill: Evol-- Okay. This is not about us evolving. 217 00:11:10,919 --> 00:11:14,502 This is about-- all about you wanting to suck Geoffrey's dick. 218 00:11:14,585 --> 00:11:17,168 Ted: You know, I want to suck a lot of dicks before I die, Bill. 219 00:11:17,251 --> 00:11:19,502 I don't wanna end up miserable like my parents. 220 00:11:19,585 --> 00:11:21,335 I don't think it's crazy after 18 years-- 221 00:11:21,418 --> 00:11:23,043 Bill: So you're miserable? That's... 222 00:11:23,126 --> 00:11:25,126 (drawer slides) 223 00:11:25,210 --> 00:11:27,418 (clattering) 224 00:11:30,251 --> 00:11:31,877 (Ted groans) 225 00:11:35,752 --> 00:11:39,418 ♪ ♪ 226 00:11:42,251 --> 00:11:44,251 ♪ ♪ 227 00:11:49,710 --> 00:11:51,794 (bicycle chain clicking) 228 00:12:08,001 --> 00:12:10,001 (lighter clicking) 229 00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:17,251 (metal scraping softly) 230 00:12:17,335 --> 00:12:18,919 (police radio chatters indistinctly) 231 00:12:19,001 --> 00:12:21,460 Officer: You put it on your head. 232 00:12:23,794 --> 00:12:26,502 Nah, kid. That thingamajig. 233 00:12:27,126 --> 00:12:30,126 It's a head massager. Come here. 234 00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:35,001 Come on. It ain't like that. 235 00:12:36,001 --> 00:12:37,460 Go ahead. 236 00:12:47,502 --> 00:12:49,043 There you go. 237 00:12:49,126 --> 00:12:51,502 All right. Have a good one. 238 00:13:01,168 --> 00:13:03,377 Noel: You even gotta pay for a baby to be born. 239 00:13:04,543 --> 00:13:06,752 Hospital won't let you leave unless you pay. 240 00:13:06,835 --> 00:13:09,085 Tarry: Don't be stupid. You can pay in installments. 241 00:13:09,168 --> 00:13:12,085 Or on a credit card, so you could get points. 242 00:13:12,168 --> 00:13:14,085 Or you could pay for it with points. 243 00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:15,919 You can't pay for a baby with points. 244 00:13:16,001 --> 00:13:17,168 Tarry: Give me that paper clip! 245 00:13:17,251 --> 00:13:19,585 Owliver: My brother was born in a parking lot. 246 00:13:20,543 --> 00:13:23,251 Tarry: Yo, what the fuck! I almost had it. 247 00:13:24,543 --> 00:13:26,794 (boys yelling and laughing) 248 00:13:26,877 --> 00:13:29,335 (clicking) 249 00:13:29,710 --> 00:13:32,460 Boys: Oh! Whoa. 250 00:13:32,543 --> 00:13:36,627 -(distant siren blaring) -Kids: Three... four... five... 251 00:13:36,710 --> 00:13:39,543 six... seven... 252 00:13:41,043 --> 00:13:42,377 Tarry: Seven seconds. 253 00:13:45,043 --> 00:13:47,919 (clicking) 254 00:13:50,377 --> 00:13:52,960 Kids (slowly): One... 255 00:13:53,043 --> 00:13:56,126 two... 256 00:13:57,251 --> 00:13:59,502 -three... -Come on! Y'all are counting too slow! 257 00:13:59,585 --> 00:14:01,210 (kids laughing) 258 00:14:02,085 --> 00:14:03,377 Shut up. 259 00:14:05,627 --> 00:14:07,377 Seven seconds. 260 00:14:10,710 --> 00:14:13,001 Tarry: Oh! He pissed himself! 261 00:14:13,085 --> 00:14:15,794 -He pissed himself. -Damn. 262 00:14:15,877 --> 00:14:17,877 -Tarry: Yo, man, it's okay. -(kids laughing) 263 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:21,085 -Tarry: It's okay, it's okay. -(kids laughing and chattering) 264 00:14:22,877 --> 00:14:24,085 Darius: Uh-huh. 265 00:14:25,585 --> 00:14:26,877 Uh-huh. 266 00:14:28,251 --> 00:14:29,293 Uh-huh. 267 00:14:31,085 --> 00:14:32,210 Uh-huh. 268 00:14:32,293 --> 00:14:33,627 Yeah. 269 00:14:36,293 --> 00:14:37,627 Uh-huh. 270 00:14:39,085 --> 00:14:40,669 -(sniffs) -Ugh! 271 00:14:40,752 --> 00:14:42,418 Uh, no, no, no. 272 00:14:42,502 --> 00:14:44,377 No, you-- You go ahead. Go ahead. 273 00:14:44,460 --> 00:14:46,210 -(clatters) -(door closes) 274 00:14:46,293 --> 00:14:48,043 (coins clinking) 275 00:14:48,126 --> 00:14:49,585 Darius: Yeah? 276 00:14:49,669 --> 00:14:51,752 (Darius laughing) 277 00:14:51,835 --> 00:14:53,543 (sighs) 278 00:14:53,627 --> 00:14:56,460 (laughs) Stop playing! 279 00:14:58,418 --> 00:15:01,627 ♪ ♪ 280 00:15:04,460 --> 00:15:08,418 -(indistinct chattering) -(distant siren blaring) 281 00:15:12,585 --> 00:15:14,377 (door opens) 282 00:15:14,460 --> 00:15:15,752 (light clicks) 283 00:15:23,001 --> 00:15:25,669 -(distant horn honking) -(indistinct chattering) 284 00:15:31,293 --> 00:15:33,293 (phone chimes) 285 00:15:36,168 --> 00:15:38,251 -(dog barking) -(baby crying) 286 00:15:38,335 --> 00:15:39,752 Mo: Shit. 287 00:15:39,835 --> 00:15:42,710 (baby crying) 288 00:15:44,335 --> 00:15:46,085 Mama's coming. Hold on. 289 00:15:46,168 --> 00:15:48,418 -Yo, I'm-- I'm sorry about the baby. -No. 290 00:15:48,502 --> 00:15:50,710 The sitter, uh, canceled on me at the last minute. 291 00:15:50,794 --> 00:15:53,043 -It's good. It's good, it's fine. -All right. 292 00:15:57,502 --> 00:15:59,377 She kind of looks like you. 293 00:15:59,460 --> 00:16:01,043 -You think so? -Mm-hmm. 294 00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:03,585 I always figured she must look like her daddy. 295 00:16:03,669 --> 00:16:05,960 Hmm. Who's her daddy? 296 00:16:06,043 --> 00:16:09,335 Donor X2X00752. Yeah. 297 00:16:09,418 --> 00:16:11,919 (chuckles) I don't know, but they told me that, uh, 298 00:16:12,001 --> 00:16:14,001 he got a 1500 on his SATs, 299 00:16:14,085 --> 00:16:16,126 and that he was a cello prodigy, 300 00:16:16,210 --> 00:16:18,794 so clearly, she's gonna be a genius. 301 00:16:18,877 --> 00:16:22,126 She's gonna be our nation's second black female president after Oprah. 302 00:16:22,210 --> 00:16:24,251 (laughs) 303 00:16:24,335 --> 00:16:26,251 Mo: So, uh, what about Joey? 304 00:16:26,335 --> 00:16:28,502 -Seen some pictures on Facebook, yo. -(laughs) 305 00:16:28,585 --> 00:16:30,919 -He looked kind of-- -Hailey: Fat. Yeah. 306 00:16:31,001 --> 00:16:32,335 What happened? 307 00:16:32,418 --> 00:16:34,585 -Diabetes. -Diabetes. 308 00:16:34,669 --> 00:16:38,293 Shit. Ooh! This is good. 309 00:16:38,377 --> 00:16:41,418 I need all this gossip. You know I'm a good four years behind 310 00:16:41,502 --> 00:16:44,043 ever since I had to block your whole damn fool family. 311 00:16:44,126 --> 00:16:47,168 You want one of these? We should toast. 312 00:16:47,251 --> 00:16:48,669 To what? 313 00:16:48,752 --> 00:16:51,001 To what? To your mama said you got a full ride 314 00:16:51,085 --> 00:16:52,794 -to the University of Chicago, that's what. -Oh, stop. It's not official, 315 00:16:52,877 --> 00:16:54,210 so I don't want to jinx it. 316 00:16:54,293 --> 00:16:56,001 Pre-law, yes? 317 00:16:56,085 --> 00:16:57,460 -That's the plan. -Yeah. 318 00:16:57,543 --> 00:16:59,502 So that's what we'll toast to. 319 00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:02,168 You representing my black ass in a court of law, ASAP. 320 00:17:02,251 --> 00:17:03,627 (Hailey chuckles) 321 00:17:03,710 --> 00:17:05,835 Wait, no, actually, I don't-- I'm good. 322 00:17:05,919 --> 00:17:07,627 -You sure? I got a beer in the fridge. -Yeah. Uh-huh. 323 00:17:07,710 --> 00:17:11,126 I'm not supposed to, um, drink 24 hours before, so... 324 00:17:11,210 --> 00:17:13,502 No. No, you are not. Good girl. 325 00:17:13,585 --> 00:17:15,043 You're right. You're right. My bad. 326 00:17:17,043 --> 00:17:19,251 Let's get the energy right up in here. 327 00:17:20,043 --> 00:17:23,835 So, your appointment is at 10 tomorrow. 328 00:17:23,919 --> 00:17:28,460 So we should definitely roll out by like, 9:30, at the latest. 329 00:17:29,502 --> 00:17:30,752 That's bad luck. 330 00:17:30,835 --> 00:17:33,377 -What's bad luck? -The, the white ones. 331 00:17:33,460 --> 00:17:35,377 White lighters? Says who? 332 00:17:35,460 --> 00:17:37,460 Says everybody. 333 00:17:39,460 --> 00:17:41,085 Bring it on. 334 00:17:41,168 --> 00:17:42,960 (chuckles) I ain't scared. 335 00:17:44,293 --> 00:17:46,251 And you got to eat something. 336 00:17:46,335 --> 00:17:48,210 My stomach is all like... 337 00:17:48,293 --> 00:17:50,627 Yeah, that makes sense, too. 338 00:17:51,627 --> 00:17:53,335 (sighs) 339 00:17:53,418 --> 00:17:55,460 (blowing) 340 00:17:56,794 --> 00:17:58,293 You smoke weed? 341 00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:01,919 -Sometimes. -(Mo laughs) 342 00:18:02,460 --> 00:18:05,377 (music playing on stereo) 343 00:18:05,460 --> 00:18:07,835 (baby babbling) 344 00:18:10,835 --> 00:18:13,627 (baby fussing) 345 00:18:15,001 --> 00:18:17,085 (blowing) 346 00:18:17,168 --> 00:18:19,043 Sheree (over phone): Is Mo around? You want me to talk to her? 347 00:18:19,126 --> 00:18:20,919 -Um, no, I think she's... -(baby crying) 348 00:18:21,001 --> 00:18:23,460 ...like, getting the baby ready, or something, so... 349 00:18:23,543 --> 00:18:26,585 How's her place? Is she... (whispers): drinking? 350 00:18:26,669 --> 00:18:29,043 -No. -Sheree: Okay, well... 351 00:18:29,126 --> 00:18:30,960 Tell her I said, "Hey," and give her a hug. 352 00:18:31,043 --> 00:18:32,418 Okay. 353 00:18:32,502 --> 00:18:35,460 Okay. I gotta run to work. I'm sorry, baby. 354 00:18:35,543 --> 00:18:36,835 It's okay. 355 00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,919 -I'm sorry I'm not there. -(crying continues) 356 00:18:40,001 --> 00:18:42,877 But you know what? We're doing the right thing. 357 00:18:43,669 --> 00:18:45,460 Call me when it's done? 358 00:18:45,543 --> 00:18:48,085 -(door opens) -Sheree: I love you, baby. 359 00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:49,710 Love you, too. 360 00:18:50,377 --> 00:18:53,001 -(baby crying) -Mo: Okay, baby girl. Come on. 361 00:18:53,085 --> 00:18:55,835 All right. Sondra is gonna be here any minute. 362 00:18:55,919 --> 00:18:59,293 Would you please let her in so I can get ready? 363 00:18:59,377 --> 00:19:01,794 -Thank you. I'll be right back. -(fussing) 364 00:19:01,877 --> 00:19:04,585 -Whew! -(crying) 365 00:19:04,669 --> 00:19:07,335 Mo: I know, sweet love. Mama's right here. Just a minute. 366 00:19:07,418 --> 00:19:10,126 Hailey: Hey. Hey. 367 00:19:10,210 --> 00:19:12,669 (gasps) Shh... 368 00:19:12,752 --> 00:19:14,585 Hailey: She just went in there. 369 00:19:14,669 --> 00:19:18,085 -(wailing) -Hey. 370 00:19:19,543 --> 00:19:20,752 Hailey: Do you wanna cry? 371 00:19:20,835 --> 00:19:23,293 -Baby: Get down! -Mo: I'm sorry, Hailey. I'm almost done. 372 00:19:23,377 --> 00:19:25,960 -Down! Down, down, down! -Hailey: Down? 373 00:19:26,043 --> 00:19:27,960 -(door opens) -Mo: Is that Miss Sondra? 374 00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:30,043 Sondra: It's me! I'm coming in! 375 00:19:30,126 --> 00:19:31,877 -Mo: Hey, Miss Sondra! -Hey! 376 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,794 -Mo: I'll be right out! -Sondra: What you all doing to this baby? 377 00:19:33,877 --> 00:19:35,669 -(crying) -Sondra: Look at you. What's wrong? 378 00:19:35,752 --> 00:19:37,835 Mo: That's my cousin Hailey visiting from back home. 379 00:19:37,919 --> 00:19:40,960 Hailey, that's Miss Sondra. She's come to save us. 380 00:19:41,043 --> 00:19:43,543 -Oh, yeah! (laughs) -Thank you so much, Miss Sondra. 381 00:19:43,627 --> 00:19:47,126 Mo: We are fed, bathed, pooped, peed. 382 00:19:47,210 --> 00:19:49,460 -She's good to go. -Sondra: Okay. 383 00:19:49,543 --> 00:19:53,001 -Mo: Lighter... Thank you so much. -(crying) 384 00:19:53,085 --> 00:19:55,001 -Sondra: Say, "Bye, Mommy." -Bye, baby girl. (kissing) 385 00:19:55,085 --> 00:19:57,960 I'm so sorry. I love you. Be good. 386 00:19:58,043 --> 00:20:00,543 -(baby crying) -Sondra: Shh. Don't cry. 387 00:20:00,627 --> 00:20:02,960 Sondra: Say "Bye-bye." Wave bye-bye. 388 00:20:03,043 --> 00:20:06,835 Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Hurry back, Mom. Yeah. 389 00:20:06,919 --> 00:20:10,168 -(Sondra cooing) -(crying softly) 390 00:20:10,251 --> 00:20:12,877 Yeah. Ooh, yeah. 391 00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,210 (indistinct chattering) 392 00:20:15,293 --> 00:20:19,001 Sweatshirts, jackets, hats off. Have your bags open. 393 00:20:19,085 --> 00:20:21,460 Empty your pockets onto the table. 394 00:20:22,126 --> 00:20:25,585 -Any weapons, knives, or mace? -Mo: Nothing like that. 395 00:20:26,794 --> 00:20:28,835 Okay, go on through. 396 00:20:31,502 --> 00:20:33,043 Guard: Go on through. 397 00:20:33,126 --> 00:20:35,877 You don't have to, like, wait with me. 398 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:37,585 You can go do something else. 399 00:20:37,669 --> 00:20:40,085 Girl, please. We gonna get you checked in. 400 00:20:40,168 --> 00:20:42,377 And then I was thinking I'd walk over to Junior's, 401 00:20:42,460 --> 00:20:46,627 and get us two big old hunks of the world's most fabulous cheesecake. 402 00:20:47,627 --> 00:20:49,877 Guard: Okay. Do you have anything in your pockets? 403 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:52,043 -(woman speaks indistinctly) -Guard: All right, go on through. 404 00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:53,960 Woman: Thank you, sir. 405 00:21:02,001 --> 00:21:03,794 (door chimes) 406 00:21:07,460 --> 00:21:10,085 She's winking at me. (chuckles) 407 00:21:10,168 --> 00:21:11,919 Yeah, forever. 408 00:21:12,001 --> 00:21:14,418 (laughs) Let's go, baby. 409 00:21:14,502 --> 00:21:16,710 (distant siren wailing) 410 00:21:20,460 --> 00:21:23,043 -Hey, man. You got a light? -Mm-hmm. 411 00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:35,293 Shit is tight. 412 00:21:35,377 --> 00:21:36,752 Thanks, man. 413 00:21:39,210 --> 00:21:42,794 Woman: ♪ I feel the whole world turning on trouble and pain ♪ 414 00:21:42,877 --> 00:21:44,293 (accordion playing) 415 00:21:44,377 --> 00:21:48,126 ♪ Enough to drive a girl insane ♪ 416 00:21:48,210 --> 00:21:50,293 ♪ And there ain't no guarantee ♪ 417 00:21:50,377 --> 00:21:54,960 ♪ You and me ain't gonna wake up... dead ♪ 418 00:21:55,043 --> 00:21:57,126 ♪ Did you hear me when I said ♪ 419 00:21:57,210 --> 00:21:59,627 ♪ I need my medicine, baby? ♪ 420 00:21:59,710 --> 00:22:01,627 (accordion playing) 421 00:22:01,710 --> 00:22:04,043 ♪ I need my medicine man ♪ 422 00:22:05,585 --> 00:22:10,293 ♪ My medicine man! ♪ 423 00:22:10,377 --> 00:22:15,251 -(audience applauding) -Thank you. Thanks. 424 00:22:17,043 --> 00:22:19,585 (playing soft, slow melody) 425 00:22:25,293 --> 00:22:28,835 ♪ If God had a name ♪ 426 00:22:28,919 --> 00:22:30,835 ♪ What would it be? ♪ 427 00:22:30,919 --> 00:22:34,335 ♪ And would you call it to his face ♪ 428 00:22:34,418 --> 00:22:40,001 ♪ If you were faced with him in all his glory? ♪ 429 00:22:40,085 --> 00:22:44,794 ♪ What would you ask if you had just one question? ♪ 430 00:22:47,543 --> 00:22:50,835 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 431 00:22:50,919 --> 00:22:53,502 -(lighter clicking) -♪ God is great ♪ 432 00:22:53,585 --> 00:22:56,168 ♪ And, yeah, yeah ♪ 433 00:22:56,251 --> 00:22:58,627 ♪ God is good ♪ 434 00:22:58,710 --> 00:23:04,043 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 435 00:23:04,126 --> 00:23:07,752 ♪ What if God was one of us ♪ 436 00:23:09,293 --> 00:23:12,460 (song fades): ♪ Just a slob like one of us... ♪ 437 00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:19,293 ♪ ♪ 438 00:23:36,919 --> 00:23:39,418 ♪ ♪ 439 00:24:03,168 --> 00:24:05,210 ♪ ♪ 440 00:24:52,210 --> 00:24:54,210 ♪ ♪ 441 00:25:21,085 --> 00:25:22,835 ♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪